Legolas: Prince of the Pretentious
 
Now, I can appreciate that other people find Orlando Bloom attractive, but he really doesn’t do much for me (at least not in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy). But there is a guy in my English class who has just ruined the character for me forever. He is a much shorter-haired, brunette, slightly tanned version of the hunky elf (including the pointy ears). However, Legolas’ most defining feature is his permanent chinstrap beard. 
 I want you to look at the wide jaw in the picture above, and then imagine a thick brown beard stretching from ear to ear (which, when untrimmed for a couple days, turns into a pointy goatee). I hope your douche-senses are tingling, because I haven’t even gotten to the best part—the brownosing things that he does! 

For starters, on the first day of class he wore a Moby Dick t-shirt, and then announced that it was his favorite book. On anyone else that would be incredibly hot, but for some reason it just ended up fueling my instinctual dislike.

I have many more examples, but those are for another post, some other day.
 

Legolas: Prince of the Pretentious

 

Now, I can appreciate that other people find Orlando Bloom attractive, but he really doesn’t do much for me (at least not in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy). But there is a guy in my English class who has just ruined the character for me forever. He is a much shorter-haired, brunette, slightly tanned version of the hunky elf (including the pointy ears). However, Legolas’ most defining feature is his permanent chinstrap beard.

 I want you to look at the wide jaw in the picture above, and then imagine a thick brown beard stretching from ear to ear (which, when untrimmed for a couple days, turns into a pointy goatee). I hope your douche-senses are tingling, because I haven’t even gotten to the best part—the brownosing things that he does!

For starters, on the first day of class he wore a Moby Dick t-shirt, and then announced that it was his favorite book. On anyone else that would be incredibly hot, but for some reason it just ended up fueling my instinctual dislike.

I have many more examples, but those are for another post, some other day.

 

  1. ibowlwithbothhands posted this